A plus-size woman with oodles of confidence says her larger-than-life personality intimidates her boyfriends.
Gwen Adora is a curvy model who has received her fair share of criticism from former beaus – as well as random members of the public.
But the 29-year-old says she’s happy the way she is and she has no plans to tone down her authentic nature.
“The men I’ve dated have appreciated my body, but my strong sense of self ends up intimidating them,” Gwen, from Toronto, Canada, told Need To Know.
“Most men do not work to build a true sense of self, but rather outwardly project an ideal version of themselves.
“They thrive when their female partners are looking to them for direction because they are able to avoid being seen for the lack of depth they have.
“These men need to distract themselves with someone else’s identity instead of their own.
“My sense of self, my body positivity, is a threat to that.”
Gwen says she also receives hate online, especially on Instagram where she has 95,100 followers.
She said: “Comments are just pixels on a screen, and the people writing them have no idea what kind of life I actually live.
“My confidence isn’t created by other people – I create it myself.
“There are some days that hate comments can get me angry or sad, but I remind myself the commenters are simply projecting based on how they view themselves.
“They should be blessed I offer them.”
Gwen has also had to deal with some extreme reactions to her body.
She said: “The typical ‘whale’ comparison comments don’t make an impact on me at this point.
“But when people start advocating for me to be hunted and harpooned… that’s when I get concerned.
“They claim they’re concerned for my health, but also wish me death at the same time.”
But she says she is not planning on letting the negativity stop her.
She said: “I’ve been creating body-positive content on the internet for such a long time.
“Even in the worst storms of internet hate, I’ve never considered stopping.
“Hate comments are unfortunately great engagement, social media analytics-wise.
“Despise is such a strong emotion, that people are statistically more likely to leave a negative comment than a positive one.
“More comments means more views, which means more traffic to my page and websites.
“The best I can do is lean into it.”
She is also thankful for the support from her family and friends.
She said: “Having real people, removed from my internet bubble, to talk to reminds me that the internet is made up.
“The controversy, the hate – it exists online. My friends and family remind me to close the screen.
“When I do that, the comments stop, because they don’t exist to me.
“I let the storm pass, and it allows me to remove any emotional ties to what people are saying.”
And to any other plus-size woman, she says to ignore the haters.
She said: “There is nothing you can or can’t do to stop haters from being mean.
“That is because you are not the problem, they are.
“When I look in the mirror, I see a full and complex person.
“Some days I see a goddess looking back at me, some days I see a gremlin in lingerie.
“Everyone has good and bad days.
“Don’t let anyone stop you from finding yourself, finding joy, and wearing the clothes that make you feel the best.”
