A British woman ‘raped, tied up and suffocated’ by her boyfriend has spoken out after 30 years to encourage other survivors to come forward.
Mary Sharp, who has waived her right to anonymity, was 20 when she was raped by her then boyfriend Martin Butler as they visited Mevagissey, Cornwall, in August 1988.
Butler, then of Stevenage, was jailed for 11 years in April 2023 at the age of 61.
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The Police and Crime Commissioner (PCC) for Devon, Cornwall and the Isles of Scilly, Alison Hernandez, praised Mary and encouraged others to report crimes to the police.
After spending a night out in Mevagissey, Mary woke up in bed to find she had been tied up and was being raped and suffocated by Butler.
She kept the secret for 30 years until 2018 when she saw a post on social media containing allegations that suggested there could be other victims of her attacker.
In the post, two other complainants against Butler, Laura Hughes and Lauren Preston, who have also waived their right to anonymity, alleged they were both sexually abused when they were 14 years old.
Their case collapsed in court due to a procedural error and Butler was cleared, as reported by Need To Know.
Mary, now 58, said of her case: “When I was raped, he blamed me and said it was my fault.
“Even though I knew in my heart he was wrong, I didn’t speak out because the fear was overwhelming.
“I was too ashamed to tell anyone and I carried the blame.
“I felt so utterly stupid to have trusted someone who could do that, so I tried to bury any memory of it.
“But the trauma never left me for over 30 years.
“As soon as I saw Laura’s social media post, my whole world just collapsed.
“I realised it wasn’t me who was to blame, it was him and I shouldn’t be wearing the shame of it.”
Mary’s ordeal features as part of a Channel 4 documentary that highlights the importance of reporting incidents of sexual abuse and violence to police.
She said when she reported Butler she did not think she would be believed.
She added the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) threw the case out twice after deciding there was not enough evidence.
“The decision was overturned and I did get an apology, but it took another five years of trauma after reporting him to get justice because of it,” she said.
“When I was told he had been found guilty and would be jailed, I literally collapsed.
“I was believed and I was allowed to have justice.
“I would encourage others to speak out because although it’s painful, it shows strength and it might stop the same perpetrator doing something as bad – or worse – to others.”
After meeting Laura and Lauren for the first time following the court case, Mary said she admired their strength to stand up and be counted.
She said: “Looking at them was like looking in a mirror and seeing the same hell that I had been through.
“We now call ourselves soul sisters.”
Mary, who has begun healing thanks to counselling and reigniting a passion for creating art, added: “Now I don’t have to hide it all the time.
“Instead, I have accepted it and although it has changed me massively, I am learning how to deal with it.”
Hernandez said: “This is a powerful reminder of how perpetrators can devastate multiple peoples’ lives, including victims and their families.
“It is vital all incidents are reported so that they can gather the intelligence needed to take cases to court.
“The burden of shame needs to be shifted away from victims or individuals with the responsibility placed back on to perpetrators whose vile behaviours will not be tolerated in our society.
“In waiving their right to anonymity, Mary, Laura and Lauren, who have taken part in this documentary, will help encourage other victims to come forward.
“I am in complete admiration of their strength and compassion for others, and Mary’s story is both heartbreaking and heartwarming.
“Victim support, funded by office, is available to all crime, regardless whether it has been reported to the police or not.”
Detective Superintendent Nicky Seager, of Devon and Cornwall Police, said: “We recognise the bravery of anyone who has suffered sexual abuse and commend the victim in this case who made the choice to report and engage with the criminal justice process.
“Devon and Cornwall Police takes all reports of sexual abuse seriously, regardless of how long ago it may have happened, and will gather any evidence as required to take appropriate action in line with the victim’s wishes.
“Victims will be listened to sympathetically and will be guided through the criminal justice process with the support of our partner agencies, including the Crown Prosecution Service, and numerous support services – including Independent Sexual Violence Advisors and Sexual Assault Referral Centres.
“As a force we remain fully committed to tackling not just sexual offences, but all reports of violence against women and girls. Each report will be thoroughly investigated by our officers.
“We recognise that every victim’s experience is different and we aim to provide a tailored response to what can often be a traumatic and difficult process.”
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