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Need To Know > Relationships > ‘I used to have a girlfriend for each day of the week – now I’m struggling to find love’
Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
Relationships

‘I used to have a girlfriend for each day of the week – now I’m struggling to find love’

Amy Walters
Last updated: October 28, 2024 5:46 am
Amy Walters Published October 28, 2024
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LX Xander. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)
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A man who used to be dubbed a “modern-day Hugh Hefner” has revealed his struggles in finding love again.

LX Xander often hits the headlines due to his controversial relationship setup and takes.

The 34-year-old, from Yorkshire, used to feel “trapped, guilty and confused” in previous monogamous relationships; and so decided to have seven at once.

READ MORE: ‘Like Britney Spears, I married myself – here is my advice for her’

But after “ditching” his collective to go celibate – which lasted two months – he’s now on the hunt for a new lineup of lovers.

Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
LX Xander. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)

Though, it’s proving a tricky task.

“My relationship status is a bit unstable at the moment,” the music producer told Need To Know.

“Some girls in, and some out.

“Maybe my standards are too high now, or maybe I’m not doing the right thing.

Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
LX Xander with a woman. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)

“Only time will tell.”

LX, who currently lives in Los Angeles, US, decided to go celibate after realizing that he wasn’t enjoying sex as much as he used to.

In a bid to “truly appreciate” the experience again, he quit cold turkey.

And the break in being intimate helped him to realize which relationships should stay – and which ones should go.

Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
LX Xander. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)

Now, although he’s got a healthier relationship with sex again, the music producer believes he’s finding difficulty securing a new lineup as he’s “pickier than ever”.

He said: “In the past few months, I’ve been involved with around 10-20 girls.

“The truth of the matter is, after my celibacy period, I’ve just become extremely picky.

“I’m more sensitive than ever to the energy I don’t resonate with, so I find myself stepping away from situations earlier than I used to if it doesn’t feel right.

Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
LX Xander. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)

“Any slight hint of a red flag, and it turns me off.

“Right now, I’m close with two girls, and there are few in the background – but I’m keeping them at arm’s length for now.”

Despite taking the risky jump, he doesn’t regret it.

And no matter what, he vows to never be monogamous again.

LX added: “I will not consider monogamy.

“The issue isn’t the format, it’s the lineup.

Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
LX Xander. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)

“The reality is that the kind of girls I want are pretty rare and specific.

“I think most people just ‘settle’ for someone who is ‘okay’ rather than holding out for the relationships they want in life.

“Not only does the type of girl I want have to be sweet, beautiful, kind, and deeply sexual – she’s also got to be alright with me seeing other girls.

“And ideally, also want to be a part of that section of my life.

Ex-"modern-day Hugh Hefner" LX Xander shares struggles in finding love after leaving celibacy and monogamy behind, now seeking a new lineup of open-minded partners.
LX Xander. (Jam Press/@lxxander.thegr8)

“I need about six women at once, and the prospect of new partners too, to ensure I’m satisfied.

“Life is full of challenges, but I don’t regret a thing.

“I’m just gradually finding my way towards my own happiness.”

READ MORE: ‘Insecure men are intimidated by my big muscles, hunting hobby and big truck – they can’t handle a real woman’

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