A mum who left her six kids behind to “start over” says that other women shouldn’t be shamed for doing the same, as “men do it all the time”.
Amanda Moss left everything – including her husband and high-earning job as well – when her business collapsed in the UK.
She saw an opportunity to “start again” abroad, so she ditched Liverpool and jetted off to Ayia Napa, Cyprus, to replicate her former success there.
And while people slammed her for being a “terrible mum”, she has no regrets.
In fact, the 53-year-old believes more mums need to start being “selfish” and leaving their families behind.
“I see so many women shrinking to fit into society’s expectations and losing their identity,” the published author told Need To Know.
“Reclaim it.
“Stop worrying about what others think.
“As long as your kids are loved and secure, then other people’s opinions mean nothing.
“People love to slam women, especially online.
“I’ve been told I look like ‘a woman with three kids from three different dads’.
“There’s no accountability for the dads that f**ked off – at least we stuck around.
“It’s just a misogynistic attitude towards women, especially those who are strong and don’t fit into the box that people want mothers to be in.
“[People] feel uncomfortable [with that].
“It’s time to flip the script; make men responsible for their failings and stop piling it all on women.”
Amanda, who went from earning £120,000 per year to £50,000, left in May 2020.
She also lost four stone and had a series of cosmetic procedures.
Her top tip to “break free”? Embrace the resentment.
She said: “Sit down and talk with your kids to see how they feel.
“If they’ve noticed you’re unhappy, like mine did, they may support the move.
“You aren’t abandoning them; when a relationship breaks down, one parent has to leave.
“Usually, it’s the man.
“We don’t stop being a mum, but we can begin to be ourselves again to make us better people in the long run.
“There will be resentment for being pushed into the situation and a lot of guilt for leaving.
“But you’ll grow.
“Never stop communicating with them; let your kids know you’re present in their lives constantly.
“And finally, live without regret.
“It’s an unnecessary energy that drains you.
“Kids adapt and thrive seeing their mum happy, rather than crying most weekends.”
Amanda, whose kids [not named for privacy reasons] are aged 24, 23, 21, 19, 16 and 11, is now onto the next phase of her transformation: finding a man.
While she’s already dabbled in a few Cypriot men, including those in their 30s, it’s proven a tricky task.
She said: “All men are disappointing and emotionally unavailable s**t bags.
“I haven’t been on a date in almost two years.
“I would like to find Mr Right, but my standards are very high and I won’t settle for breadcrumb affection.
“When I’m clubbing, they come up to me and say: ‘You’re a proper MILF, ’ it gives me the ick.
“I think I’m swearing off men for good.”
Amanda, who wrote a book called You’re Going to Die So Do It Anyway, says women “don’t get old, they get wiser”.
She added: “I’m not a carton of milk; there’s no sell-by date on me.
“People need to mind their own business.
“If they’re not paying my bills, then they have no say on how I live my life.
“I’m free – and it’s about time other mums find that freedom, too.”
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