A woman has revealed how she managed to overcome a cocaine addiction which saw her spending £800 a month and seriously struggling with her mental health.
Danielle Moore seemed like the “life of the party”, but beneath the drug-fuelled smiles was a young woman trapped in a downward spiral, barely sleeping and battling suicidal thoughts.
The 26-year-old started taking cocaine at just 18, taking it on nights out or while at parties, but soon escalated to daily use as a “coping mechanism” to battle her anxiety.
It got to the point where she would wake up and take a bump in the mornings, spending hundreds of pounds to keep up with her addiction.
“I had different groups of dangerous people round for parties every evening and rarely slept because I didn’t want to ever feel the low or have the crash,” Danielle, an accredited sober coach from Leigh-on-Sea, Essex, told Need To Know.
“I realised it had become an addiction when I wasn’t able to have a glass of wine without craving cocaine.
“I had extreme facial swelling from the amount of alcohol I was drinking but remained under weight.
“I went away volunteering to Tanzania in 2022 to try and get away from the drink and drugs and have a reset for two months, which did really help.
“However, as soon as I got back, I immediately started doing cocaine again and was in such a low place I started doing it in the mornings.
“This is when I knew I had to make a serious change and get help.”
Danielle started using the drug while partying on nights out at the age of just 18 – but it became a slippery slope.
She said: “Every year older I got, I was using it more and more regularly, until it got to a stage in my early 20s of doing it every day – including in the mornings.
“I was really struggling with my mental health and didn’t like feeling anxious, so I used it as a coping mechanism to feel a buzz and stay out all night.
“I used it as a way to avoid my feelings and not be in my head.
“I needed a constant high to escape the low.
“It was definitely avoidance of real life and anxiety that triggered me to use cocaine so much.”
Danielle was struggling with her mental health at the time, and was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD) – which can lead to emotional instability and even suicidal thoughts.
Things came to a head for Daniele while celebrating Oktoberfest in 2023.
She said: “I drank alcohol and took cocaine all day and seriously considered ending my life.
“I had seemed like the life of the party all day but went home and self-harmed.
“No one knew how much pain I was in and I was at rock bottom.”
The devastating experience led her to seek therapy and support – which she says has been “life-changing”.
She focused on sobriety, guided by a therapist, which was “really tough” but paid off.
Danielle said: “It has been completely transformative.
“When I came to terms with the fact I must be fully sober, everything started changing and improving for the better.
“The early stages are really tough as you have to face everything you’ve been running from for so long and work through uncomfortable feelings.
“It’s also hard work learning how to manage anxiety and low moods in a healthy way.
“It takes full commitment to break the old habit of drinking and taking cocaine to cope, and replace it with something sustainable and healthy.
“I received so much positive reinforcement very quickly on my recovery journey which made it so much easier to stick with, and I had very supportive people around me – which I’m so lucky to have had.
“I find life without alcohol and cocaine so effortless and am my best self, someone I am very proud to be.
“I’m an entirely new person – I couldn’t be more grateful for the life I now get to lead.”
Danielle has been sober for more than two years now, and is enjoying a “positive and peaceful life” – having trained as a sober coach to help other people struggling with addiction.
She also focuses her energies on fitness, and celebrated running a marathon and completing a Hyrox event last year.
She no longer exhibits symptoms of BPD – which she believes was exacerbated by her cocaine and alcohol misuse.
Danielle said: “It’s heartbreaking how common cocaine is in the party circuit.
“It’s glamourised as an upper-market drug that ‘picks you up’ and keeps you going so you can party longer, but it’s actually just a highly addictive poison which inevitably kills you.
“It’s so easy to get caught up in believing it’s just a bit of short-term fun, but when mixed with alcohol it forms a whole new drug called cocaethylene – it’s highly dangerous and addictive.”
Danielle is sharing her story to warn other young people about the dangers, adding: “Cocaine might be presented to you as a fun confidence-booster, but very quickly you will see what it really is.
“It will destroy your mental health and take away all the unique, warm qualities that make you, you.
“A feeling won’t kill you, but alcohol and cocaine will.
“It is not a sustainable coping method and will destroy you from the inside out, no matter who you are.
“The quote ‘one day or day one’ is so true.
“You have to choose a day one and start if you ever want the dream of feeling better one day to happen.
“It really is possible to turn everything around.”
