An influencer has revealed how girls used to get “swept away” from him in school – but now he’s become the man women “can’t resist”.
LX Xander is known for his controversial relationship setup and opinions on commitment.
The 35-year-old, from Yorkshire, has seven women on the go – and is currently looking for an eighth to join the collective.
But his popularity with the ladies hasn’t always been this way.
In fact, growing up, he was dubbed the “loser” at school and “struggled” to find love.
“I thought there was something wrong with me,” the music producer told Need To Know.
“The thought of ever finding love, let alone with multiple people, seemed so complicated and difficult.
“At the beginning, I was homeschooled, so when I went to a regular school, it took me a little while to get used to the daily social interactions.
“I was a little bit weird and acted a bit too “grown up” since I had been around only adults so much.
“There was this one kid, who was shorter, skinnier and less good-looking than me, who used to get all the girls I wanted.
“He’d steal them right from me.
“I couldn’t understand why.
“It wasn’t for a few years until I understood what I needed to do.”
LX, who currently lives in Los Angeles, US, recalls weighing 23st, dressing “flamboyantly” and sporting colourful hair.
He switched up his look when going to university, losing over 6st, though he says his biggest lesson was learning that it’s not about how you look, but the way you carry yourself.
He said, “I started to do a lot of my own research into female and male dynamics to help understand attraction better.
“Over the next few years, I spent a lot of time at bars and clubs talking to people and trying out my newfound skills.
“I crafted a persona that felt like an ‘amped up’ version of myself.”
Using the traits that women appeared to like, he channelled them, going on to get all over tattoos and switch his wardrobe for “striking” clothes.
Though he believes these “superficial” reasons aren’t what have gained him a collective.
He learned what makes women swoon – and the mistakes men often make when trying to make a move.
LX said: “The traits they’re usually repelled by are things that imply weakness of character or lack of self-belief.
“If a man behaves in a way that makes her feel like he’s trying too hard to impress, or is hiding something, that’ll make her feel unsafe.
“Girls hate bad vibes and weird body language – such as standing too close, or too far away, or smiling too much, or too little.
“You don’t have to be muscular with a deep voice; [but think about] where your behaviour is coming from more than the behaviour itself.
“Women can see through the cracks if someone is putting on a front.”
LX also says the most important thing is to be fun, as those who are only focused on the end goal give off the “ick”.
He eventually got a girlfriend in his late teens, before going on to date multiple women at once in his 30s.
Now, he thinks monogamy is “complicated” as he isn’t able to suppress his old habits and behaviours when with just one person.
He likes being able to explore genuine attraction and chemistry with strangers, as it helps him to feel free.
LX added: “I don’t want to let any opportunities pass me by because I’ve made a promise of monogamy to someone.
“This lifestyle is better and easier for me.
“It’s more aligned with who I am now.
“The boy I was back in school wouldn’t believe where I am now.
“I’ve gone from being a loser that no girl wanted to being in demand 24/7.
“It’s proof that you’re not single because of a lack of options – it’s because you’re not exploring your full potential.”
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