A young mum was haunted by horrifying hallucinations that made her believe her baby was lying dead in her cot before being diagnosed with postpartum psychosis.
Jessie Calvert welcomed her daughter, Matilda Eve Dent, after being induced two days earlier.
The 20-year-old suffered a life-threatening postpartum haemorrhage shortly after giving birth and was in constant pain, repeatedly returning to hospital for seven months.
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Over that time, her mental health began to deteriorate.
The first warning signs were intrusive thoughts that something terrible would happen to her baby.
“I was doing everything in my power to prevent something bad from happening,” Jessie, from Stockton-on-Tees, County Durham, told Need To Know.
“I was moving furniture around in my room and I was sleeping on top of the duvet.
“I knew that this wasn’t normal.
“Then I had intrusive thoughts about my baby coming to harm and I could hear voices telling me that if I didn’t do something they wanted me to do then Matilda would be hurt.
“The voices got louder and more frequent.
“I also started seeing visual disturbances such as people standing in my room near my baby.
“I saw my baby not alive in her crib even though she was alive and breathing.
“I saw Matilda with monster-like features.
“I stopped leaving the house because the visual and audio hallucinations became more frequent.
“I was so sleep deprived from not wanting to sleep as I was scared my baby would stop breathing or get hurt.”
The voices eventually told her to harm herself, telling her that doing so would keep Matilda safe.
Stay-at-home mum Jessie was eventually admitted to a mother and baby unit in November 2025 for six weeks – 10 months after welcoming the tot.
She said: “My lowest point was planning out and thinking about how I was going to end my life.
“I remember thinking that my daughter had so much female influence around her that she wouldn’t remember me as her mum and that my family would do a better job at raising her than I ever would.
“I didn’t want to be admitted but I was scared that if I didn’t go things would only end up worse and that my daughter would end up without a mum.
“I was so scared and lonely at first.
“I was miles away from my family but I soon met the most amazing group of mums; they were all supportive of each other.
“We all made strong connections; even with our babies being at different ages, we all seemed to give advice and help each other out as much as we possibly could.
“The staff were absolutely amazing; I’ve never felt so looked after and safe.
“They reassured me and my daughter that everything was going to be okay.”
Single mum Jessie was diagnosed with postnatal depression and postnatal psychosis in November 2025.
She says she has little memory of Matilda’s first year because she was simply trying to survive.
She said: “I was in a state of survival mode.
“I can’t remember her first laugh, smile, first bath or bringing her home from hospital.
“This affected my bond with Matilda as I thought that she wouldn’t remember that I was her mum.”
Jessie had discovered she was pregnant on the morning of her 18th birthday and she says her pregnancy was filled with happy memories.
She said: “I was shocked and surprised but I was so happy I was going to be a mum.
“I just wanted everything to be okay.
“There were so many happy moments while I was pregnant, like the 4D scan and our gender reveal.”
Jessie believes her recovery only truly began in May this year after trialling medication to help with sleep deprivation and to stabilise her moods.
She is now undergoing cognitive behavioural therapy and continues to receive support from specialist perinatal mental health services.
Jessie said: “I couldn’t thank my family enough for everything they’ve supported me through.
“My mum, dad and family friends have all been so amazing.
“They are all so special to me and my little girl and if it wasn’t for them helping me speak up, then this story might’ve ended very differently.
Today, she says she and Matilda share an incredibly close bond.
She added: “Me and Matilda have the strongest bond.
“She is my whole world and I’ve never been prouder to call her my daughter.
“I want people to know that as scary as it is talking about this, it’s so important to tell someone how you feel.
“It’s going to be scary but it’s a rollercoaster and the light at the end of the tunnel is so bright that it makes you forget about the dark passages.”
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