Influencer Eltoria has shared the devastating news that she had a miscarriage at seven-weeks pregnant – in a bid to encourage other women to speak up about the “taboo” subject.
The YouTuber, 29, from Bath, was thrilled when she found out she was expecting a baby with her partner Joe earlier this year.
The couple had planned to spend a year trying for a baby and were thrilled to conceive during their first month of trying.
Eltoria – real name Simone Partner – had an early pregnancy scan and found out she was 5.5 weeks pregnant and the sonographer said that all looked well.
Although aware it was early days, the thrilled couple set about converting their garage into another bedroom in preparations for their new addition.
But just a few days after having a six-week scan – a second, internal scan – Eltoria started experiencing spotting.
“I was so freaked out by it that I called the early pregnancy clinic,” the blogger told Jam Press.
“A midwife told me it was incredibly normal and that it was probably where the internal scan dislodged old blood.
“I relaxed and the spotting eventually stopped after a day or two.
“A few days later – when I would usually have been due on my period – the spotting started again, but this time it looked like old blood mixed with coffee granules.
“I didn’t feel right, I felt very unwell, dizzy and had no energy. I gave myself a bed day and tried not to worry.
“The next morning when I woke up, there was fresh blood and lots of it.”
Eltoria said she knew right away what had happened, and was also experiencing cramping.
She immediately called the early pregnancy unit but struggled to get through, so resorted to calling 111 and became panicked when she again couldn’t get through to a call handler.
Frightened, she booked an appointment within the hour for a private ultrasound.
On the way there, she needed the toilet and described seeing “horrific blood clots” coming out of her.
The ultrasound found no baby present, and she had another internal scan that confirmed the miscarriage.
Eltoria said: “I burst into tears but tried to compose myself. The midwife went on to say both my ovaries and womb were super healthy and that was reassuring but it didn’t give any answers as to why I miscarried.”
After the scan, she and her partner were inconsolable.
Eltoria added: “Some may be of the opinion that ‘it wasn’t a baby yet’ but when you first see that positive pregnancy test for the first time, your whole mind changes and you go into ‘mum mode’. It doesn’t matter how far along you were in your pregnancy, it is still a tragic loss.”
Devastatingly, Eltoria’s body continued to mimic pregnancy symptoms for three weeks after her miscarriage, including sore breasts and nausea.
She said: “During those three weeks, I still continued to take pregnancy tests as it takes time for the pregnancy hormone HCG to go from your system – something that I didn’t know was a thing.
“I just wanted to monitor it and it gave an explanation for the continuing pregnancy symptoms.
“I was also testing positive on ovulation tests. When you have a miscarriage you are pretty eager to go again, so reading a positive ovulation stick was quite exciting.
“However, I do not recommend taking ovulation tests straight after a miscarriage as I believe they only give false hope. Ovulation sticks detect LH Hormone whereas pregnancy tests detect HCG hormone, however, these hormones are both very similar and if you have HCG hormone still in your system it can show positive on an ovulation test.”
Eltoria shared the heartbreaking update with fans on YouTube and Instagram, where she typically posts about beauty and lifestyle.
The video racked up 18,000 views on YouTube, where followers were quick to laud her bravery in opening up.
One person said: “Thank you so much for using your platform to break the taboo. I suffered a miscarriage myself in September at 9 weeks (we also got pregnant first try) and there’s no feeling like it, you summed it up well, you feel empty. I’m sorry you had to go through it too.”
“Thank you for posting this. Sending all the love, really helped me as I suffered one last year. I am the same age as you and we also got pregnant the first month too! So similar,” another user commented.
Someone else added: “I’m so sorry this happened to you too. I had a missed miscarriage at 8 weeks April last year and had to have medication to help pass everything because my body didn’t let go. It was so hard physically and emotionally. I’m now 32 weeks with the next baby and he seems perfect on all the tests and scans.”
Eltoria has described sharing her story online as “therapy”.
She said: “The support that I have had has been absolutely unreal. I genuinely thought I was alone but the number of brave women who came forward to share their experience was not expected. I was most surprised by the number of women that I personally knew in my life who had experienced the same thing but kept it quiet.
“If I hadn’t received the amount of support that I received online, I genuinely think that I would still be in a rut today. I’d still be beating and blaming myself trying to pinpoint a cause for it.
“Instead, I fully understand that miscarriages are super common, and most importantly, I am not alone in this. I did book in to see my GP after my miscarriage where I asked for a blood test and I would encourage anyone else to do the same.
“I really want to share my experience to educate and offer support to anyone else going through the same thing because the support after miscarriages is honestly shocking.
“When it happened to me, I was frantically googling and researching on YouTube and found that there wasn’t really anything out there. I was trying to find someone to who I could relate to but struggled.
“This is what I want to change, I want to voice to other women that they should not suffer in silence and I want my videos on YouTube to create a hub for support, a place where they can ask questions and read other conversations and experiences.
“It’s a big and traumatic thing to go through and I really believe that we need to put a stop to miscarriages being a taboo subject.”
