A mum-of-two who was left a “shell of herself” because of alleged emotional abuse at the hands of her boyfriend, who she calls a “Tinder Swindler” has claimed he has done this to 25 other women too.
Abigail Cane, 29, who works for Vodafone and is from Stoke on Trent, first met her boyfriend, not named, at the end of June 2022.
At first, he was a “gentleman” showering her with affection but weeks into their relationship, his behaviour allegedly drastically changed.
Abigail claims she was emotionally abused into letting her ex live with her, as well as add his name to the rental agreement – at the time, the pair had only dated for two weeks.
She also claims he would threaten to harm himself if she left the house. The relationship began to chip away at her mental health, as the young woman retreated into herself.
“I was asking myself if it was all my fault, that I deserved this abuse and it turns out he had done it to 25 other women,” she told Jam Press.
“It is sickening.
“You became a shell of who you are, you lose your personality, your characteristics, who you want to be.
“I was stripped of my identity and became a blank page; it’s the only way I can describe it. “I felt like I was nothing.”
On 1 September, two-and-a-half months into their relationship, the abuse allegedly became so bad that Abigail called the police for assistance.
She said: “One time I came home and he was in the back garden, punching his face vigorously, I had never seen anything like it in my life.
“He was smashing his phone on the floor and kept telling me everything was my fault.
“He knew what he was doing, he knew that because of my social anxiety I wouldn’t leave the house and he loved that, it was clear I wasn’t the only one he had done this too.
“This man would make up such huge lies about his past, he would make you feel sorry for him, sorry to the extent you’re willing to do anything to help him.”
Officers came to the home around 5.25pm and have told Jam Press inquiries are ongoing.
Following the incident, Abigail broke up with her partner and he moved out.
Soon after, she decided to share her experience online to warn other women and what happened next has left her shocked.
She claims to have received over 20 messages from other women who recognised her ex and said he had exposed them to the same emotional tirade.
He had allegedly met each of the women on Tinder, with several of them claiming the man had “harassed” them, according to Abigail.
Abigail said: “To me, it was clear I wasn’t the only one he had done this too.
“After posting online, my phone kept buzzing, more than 20 women began messaging me saying that my ex had done the same thing to them after meeting him on Tinder.
“My stomach dropped, I was so shocked, I wasn’t expecting so many people to come forward.
“While I was in the relationship with him, he would make me drive weird ways to places, and I soon found out that this was so he could go past one of his ex’s house and spy on her.
“It has felt like dealing with the Tinder Swindler, like this needs to be documented.
“I had done a background check on him but it just goes to show how you can never be too careful.”
Tinder has since removed the man’s profile from their app.
A spokesperson told Jam Press: “We wanted to let you know that, on background, this profile has been permanently removed from Tinder.
“Tinder encourages all members to report any behaviour that violates our policies.”
“Police were called to an address off Furlong Lane, Stoke-on-Trent, at 5.25pm on Thursday (1 September),” a spokesperson from Staffordshire Police told Jam Press.
“Officers attended and a woman, in her 20s, reported being harassed by a man with vulnerabilities.
“Inquiries are ongoing.”
