A mum who found a lump in her breast while pregnant says she initially dismissed it as a blocked milk duct — before learning she had incurable cancer.
Kirsty Brunt was 18 weeks pregnant with daughter Phoenix when she noticed the lump.
The 42-year-old believed the changes were linked to her pregnancy and breastfeeding her then-two-year-old daughter Stevie.
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But six weeks later she decided to get it checked and was given the devastating news that she had breast cancer.
“I felt like the world was ending,” Kirsty, from Great Harwood, Lancashire, told Need To Know.
“I hadn’t even been worried and I’d gone to the appointment alone.
“It felt utterly surreal, like it was happening to someone else.”
Because the cancer fed on oestrogen, the pregnancy itself increased the risk to her health.
Kirsty, also mum to Stanley, seven, began chemotherapy when she was 27 weeks pregnant, in July 2023.
She was monitored closely to make sure that the placenta wasn’t being affected by the treatment.
Phoenix, now two, was born via c-section at 36 weeks – being delivered early due to the risks the pregnancy posed for her.
The mental health social worker said: “I was absolutely terrified at the thought of having treatment while pregnant.
“My main concern throughout was my unborn child.
“[But] I also had to consider the bigger picture, in that if I didn’t have treatment my child might not have a mother for very long.
“The longer I was pregnant, the better it was for my baby, but the worse it was for me so we had to find that balance because my cancer was hormone positive which means it was fed by oestrogen and when you’re pregnant you have loads of it.
“We agreed that the goal was to get to 35 weeks pregnant to increase Phoenix’s chances of fully developed lungs.
“I felt completely robbed of my pregnancy and newborn period and maternity leave.”
Kirsty was devastated she couldn’t breastfeed because chemotherapy made her milk unsafe but she “bonded perfectly” with Phoenix.
She said: “When I met her, I just couldn’t believe we’d made it this far.
“I was so anxious about carrying and delivering her safely.
“I had to reframe my thinking and give myself lots of pep talks, mostly saying things like ‘cancer has robbed enough from me during this pregnancy, I will not allow it to take anymore from me and I am choosing to enjoy my newborn bubble’.
“Obviously this didn’t always work but it did help channel my energy into being positive and focussed on being a mum.
“I always remind myself I am a mother before I’m a cancer patient.
“I read a quote that said ‘don’t let your storm get your kids wet’ and it really resonated with me.
“A big worry I had was that my children would see me ill, or that they would miss out on having fun that summer.
“I didn’t need to worry because my friends and family rallied round to help with that.
“I was still involved in every bed time and every morning routine, I wanted some sense of normality to remain, and I didn’t want the kids to feel scared or worried.
“I have no idea how I cope emotionally but you just do, you have to, being a mum gives you strength you had no idea existed, and really what other option is there.”
Following the birth, scans initially suggested she had responded extremely well to treatment.
However, after undergoing surgery including a lumpectomy and lymph node clearance, doctors discovered all 25 lymph nodes removed still contained cancer.
Further scans in March 2024 revealed the disease had spread to her bones and that the cancer was incurable.
Kirsty said: “I felt like my life had ended and I was on death’s door.”
Luckily, there were treatment options on hand, and the mum-of-three had 20 sessions of radiotherapy.
Now, she is undergoing oral chemotherapy and hormone therapy to medically induce menopause and lower her oestrogen levels.
Kirsty says that parenting throughout treatment has been a “challenge”.
She said: “I have to not be so wrapped up in my own stuff that I’m not a good mum, having three young children whilst battling my own treatment related fatigue and side effects is difficult.
“And I have to keep being fun mum when actually I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders.
“There are financial worries after having to give up my career, logistics and time associated with having lots of medical appointments and also trying to practice self-care, stay healthy and look after myself all whilst still doing all the mum things.
“Normal life and normal stress and mundane tasks and food shopping etc don’t all stop just because I have cancer.”
But Kirsty says humour, family support and a close-knit WhatsApp group of young mothers with cancer have helped her cope.
She said: “I laugh every single day.
“There is not one day since having kids that I haven’t had something to laugh about.
“Another really important part is finding your tribe.
“I’m in a group called ‘the shtty ttties’, we are all mums with young children in our thirties and forties and we all found each other through having cancer.
“It’s really sad but also kind of beautiful.
“It’s basically free therapy and dark humour but it’s just the most weird and wonderful group of amazing strong supportive women.
“We speak every day and I literally could not do this without them.
“I’m also blessed with a fantastic support network of family, husband, siblings and friends.
“It’s not the end, if you’re going through this, find your people.
“There’s some amazing support networks out there such as Mummy’s Star charity, Facebook groups, face to face and online support.
“Don’t give this cancer the power to ruin your time with your baby, choose to take some of that power back.”
She is now fundraising to explore treatments not currently available on the NHS that may give her more time with her family.
Kirsty said: “The fundraiser is specifically for me to access treatments not available on the NHS, both medical and holistic.
“I’m carrying out research and making contact with various options.
“I actually haven’t quite decided yet which path to go down because it’s such a big decision and even double the fundraising goal wouldn’t cover everything.
“I need to choose wisely and will also need some further enhanced testing in order to establish what I might be an appropriate candidate for.
“Ultimately, although there are no guarantees, it would mean more time with my husband and children.
“I can’t just take this lying down and need to know that I’ve done everything I possibly can.
“Nobody will ever be able to say that I gave up.”
Kirsty is also urging pregnant and breastfeeding women not to ignore unusual breast changes.
She added: “If you are pregnant, breastfeeding or postpartum and notice any unusual breast changes, please do not dismiss this as pregnancy or hormone related.
“I think our bodies go through so much and change a lot, and that can mean we could attribute something serious as something normal.”
To donate, go to Donate to Fundraising for Kirsty to have more tomorrows, organized by Brooke Darlington
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