A mum has shared how she welcomed triplets “born apart” with three IVF cycles after spending three years trying to conceive.
For a long time, Stephanie Brar, from Birmingham, was unable to look at family photos that friends posted online, and would make up excuses to get out of attending baby showers and children’s birthday parties.
Seeing other people’s dreams of holding a baby was simply too painful while she and husband Sherry struggled to have a bundle of joy of their own.
The constant disappointment took its toll on the 34-year-old as the dream of motherhood seemed to slip away.
The couple tried everything – from strict diets and supplements to fertility drugs – but every month ended in heartbreak.
“When someone asked me what day it was, I was more likely to say, ‘cycle day 12’ than ‘Tuesday’,” Stephanie told Need To Know.
“People who knew that we were struggling to conceive told us to ‘just relax and it will happen’.
“This made me feel like it was my fault, that I was the reason it wasn’t working.
“Sherry longed to be a father so he could have that father/son bond that he’d missed out on.
“Every day, we were reminded of what we were missing.
“Seeing other women with their hands resting on their pregnancy bumps.
“Seeing babies and toddlers in the supermarket aisles.
“Spending time with the children of friends.
“I longed to push my own baby in a pram; to shop in the baby section of stores, rather than run past them, aching inside.
“In the end, it all became too much.
“I couldn’t bear to see all the happy baby and family pictures everyone was posting, so I deactivated my social media accounts.
“I gave my excuses for missing friends’ baby showers and children’s birthday parties.
“It was just too painful.”
Stephanie and her husband, Sherry, who met at university and hoped to start a family soon after getting married, began trying when Stephanie was 24 in early 2015.
But the dream of a baby quickly became wrapped up in ovulation charts, basal body temperature readings, and countless over-the-counter remedies.
They tried pre-seed, fertility-friendly diets, soft cups, supplements, and even six months of strict lifestyle changes – all with no success.
She said: “Normally in life, the harder you try, the better the outcome.
“But with conception, no matter what we tried, I always got the same negative result.
“I was devastated every time I got my period.
“I felt I had failed, like we were being punished.
“I felt embarrassed, ashamed, and so lonely.”
After three years, the couple sought help at Care Fertility in Birmingham.
At the clinic, Stephanie discovered she had Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), a hormonal condition that disrupts ovulation.
In her case, the cycles sometimes lasted up to 50 days, compared to the average of 28 days, making it almost impossible to predict fertile windows.
The couple decided the best course was egg collection to preserve as many eggs as possible, followed by IVF.
The first egg collection later that year (2018) was a success, giving them four viable embryos.
Stephanie said: “I’m so grateful that the first transfer worked and I had a smooth pregnancy with our first baby boy, George, who was born in 2019.
“IVF and science and the magic of all that did give me the family we had been longing for.”
The couple wanted their children close in age, so they tried again with another embryo during the pandemic and were blessed with a second son, Jacob, in 2021.
Stephanie said: “I just felt far too lucky.”
A few years later, after discovering one of their two remaining frozen embryos hadn’t survived the thaw, a third transfer gave them their little girl, Rosie.
Stephanie said: “It felt like a dream come true, honestly, because I already had my two amazing boys.
“Now I’ve got my triplets, born apart, but from the same egg collection.”
Despite her newfound family joy, Stephanie is candid about the emotional toll of struggling with fertility and says it was difficult for Sherry, too.
The mum’s experience has left her passionate about raising awareness for PCOS.
She said: “It can happen to you.
“I felt like it would never happen for me, but I’m proof that it can.”
Dr Alison Richardson, Consultant Gynaecologist at Care Fertility, explained that PCOS affects fertility because it disrupts ovulation.
She said: “Supplements can sometimes help balance hormone levels and improve egg quality, but they are not a magic fix.
“Couples struggling with PCOS should seek medical guidance early, as timely interventions like IVF can make a real difference.”
Stephanie said her and Sherry’s story is not just about IVF success, but about hope, resilience and the power of modern fertility treatments.
She added: “We have our family now, and it feels miraculous.
“I’m so proud of Sherry, too.
“He’s been my rock.
“He’s the reason I kept going and didn’t give up.
“On days when I couldn’t get out of bed because I was broken, he would look after me, feed me, and just hold me while I cried.
“Infertility brought us closer together, which I’m thankful for, as I know it can be tough for others.
“For anyone struggling with PCOS, don’t give up – there is light at the end of the tunnel.”
Today, Stephanie’s triplets – George, Jacob, and Rosie – fill their home with joy, providing proof that even long, difficult journeys to parenthood can have a happy ending.
