A woman who is a prison wife has revealed how she “stays sane” while her partner is behind bars serving a life sentence.
The woman, who goes by “B”, met her husband when he was one month into his 12 years-to-life sentence.
They never discuss his crime unless it is absolutely necessary as B says it has “zero” to do with her.
B often shares insights into her life on social media, including what it’s really like to be married to someone who is in prison.
In a recent video post, which garnered more than 15,000 views, B shared how she’s managed to keep clear-headed while wed to Justin, 40.
“Honestly, the way I stay sane… probably the fact that my husband is just so nice,” B told Need To Know.
“It’d be much harder to do this if he was an a*e that was treating you crappy, then I would be like ‘OK I’m out of here.’
“What gives me the reason to stay?
“So, it’s the fact that my husband is just so unequivocally nice to me, there’s so much patience, he’s so kind, he’s so gentle.”
The 39-year-old based in Canada, who works in real estate, also revealed that while Justin is currently in “lockdown” for 23 hours a day and they can only speak on the phone for 45 minutes, she’s “never once” heard him complain.
She explained: “I have to take a step back and start listening to my husband, because he’s the one who’s going through so much more than I am.
“So if my husband wasn’t nice then it would be very difficult – that and wine definitely helps.”
Justin, who is on the phone to B during the online clip, added: “Your compassion, the way that you deal with me.
“You know I like to whine sometimes about the tough love you give me but I know at the end of the day it’s just because you want the best for me, for our family.”
B met her now-husband in 2003, when he was just one month into his 12 years-to-life sentence, during a trip to the prison to see her friend’s partner.
Justin has served 23 years in prison and is eligible for parole, something which B says the couple are looking forward to.
The pair, who each have a teen child, are now expecting their first child together.
They see each other once per week and are able to have a private family visit, an overnight stay at the prison, every six to eight weeks.
B has shared her thoughts on people who might criticise their relationship.
She added: “I understand why they would be uncomfortable with the dynamic, but my husband and I have loved each other since we’ve been teenagers.
“He’s truly the nicest, kindest and gentlest man I know.
“He truly lets me be my absolute self.
“I feel so safe and comfortable with him. He’s so easygoing and laid back.
“I’ve known much worse people who are free and no crimes have been committed.”
B regularly gets asked how she could be with someone serving a life sentence, and gives the same answer each time.
She said: “My answer is simple – because my husband is genuinely kind.
“In over 23 years, he has never once raised his voice at me.
“He has never made me feel small, unsafe, or controlled.
“If anything, he’s the person around whom I can be most myself.
“He’s patient, and steady; qualities people don’t expect, but ones I experience every single day.
“I’ve known him my entire life. He hasn’t changed in his heart.
“He’s grown wiser, more thoughtful, more measured, but who he is at his core has always been the same.
“Loving, respectful, and deeply human.
“People expect someone hardened by prison to be cold or angry.
“The truth is, the way he treats me couldn’t be further from that stereotype.
“He’s a walking green flag and anyone who truly knows him sees that.”
B says that while she tends to keep to herself these days, her friends don’t judge – and some of them are even prison wives themselves.
She said: “The only person that didn’t like us together was my Gramma.
“I used to live with her 23 years ago when I dated Justin.
“She would steal all our letters out of the mailbox before I could even read them.
“She even threatened to kick me out.”
B admitted that being a prison wife can sometimes leave her feeling “isolated”, but she emphasised that she likes to focus on what it will be like when Justin comes home.
B added: “I’m looking forward to us getting our cottage, raising our children and being the happiest family, who spends most of their time together.
“We are only going to be working part time so we can make up for the 23 years we lost.”
READ MORE: ‘I’m the SPIN QUEEN – people fly across the globe for my workouts but trolls say they’re VULGAR’
