Sleepovers, shopping alone and staying out with friends – Britain’s children have revealed the everyday moments that make them feel like they are finally growing up.
New research, commissioned by TUI and supported by TV favourite and mum Josie Gibson, has unveiled that parental trust and confidence are the true building blocks of childhood independence.
According to the UK’s first-ever Childhood Independence Index, released today (7 July) more than four in 10 children (41%) say that being trusted by their parents makes them feel independent, while 36% associate independence with confidence.
READ MORE: England fans bring streets to a standstill partying at 4am – ‘Nobody is going to work today’
Based on a study of 1,000 UK parents and 1,000 children aged 10 to 15, the Index explores the childhood moments that make youngsters feel truly grown up, the ages they believe they should first be trusted with those milestones, and the emotions those moments trigger for parents.
Rather than one defining event, the research suggests growing up is built through dozens of small firsts – from buying something yourself and walking to school, to spending pocket money or staying at a friend’s house for the first time.
Whilst for parents, the shift often arrives in one small, emotional moment as they realise their child doesn’t need them quite as much anymore.
To explore the subject further, Josie joined forces with TUI to host a lively focus group with children aged four to eight, asking what makes them feel like “big kids” and the things they can’t wait to do on their own.
The children’s answers – shared on camera – closely mirrored the survey, with trust emerging as the defining thread across both pieces of research.
One youngster proudly revealed he planned to invest his pocket money in Premium Bonds, another declared riding a horse made him feel grown up because “it didn’t even need fuel”, while others pointed to learning to swim, riding a bike, ordering their own food and spending their own money as the moments they finally felt like “big kids”.
The Childhood Independence Index ranked some of childhood’s biggest rites of passage, asking older children when they believed youngsters should first be trusted with each milestone.
Walking around a holiday resort alone emerged as the earliest milestone, with children saying they feel ready from around the age of seven.
Staying at a friend’s house followed at age eight, while staying out later with friends came at nine.
Ten proved to be something of a landmark age, with children saying they felt ready to travel short distances alone, walk to school, go into a shop by themselves, spend their own pocket money and own a first mobile phone.
Listening to the children’s stories, Josie, who has a seven-year-old son Reggie, was “left in stitches”.
“They all had completely different ideas about what made them feel grown, up,” said the 41-year-old This Morning presenter.
“Some were excited about ordering their own food, others just loved being trusted to do things on their own, and one savvy seven-year-old was already talking about investing in Premium Bonds.
“I thought, blimey – good on him!
“It was hilarious, but underneath it, they were all saying the same thing – they just want to be trusted and given a little more independence.”
Like Josie, many parents described childhood independence as a mixture of pride, excitement and sadness.
One parent said they realised their child was growing up “when they no longer wanted to hold my hand”, while another recalled the day their daughter “walked into school without turning back to wave”.
For many parents, letting go isn’t always easy – but holidays appear to make it feel a little easier.
Almost six in 10 parents (58%) said they feel more comfortable giving children greater independence while away, while more than three quarters (77%) admitted relaxing everyday rules on holiday, with bedtimes, spending money and screen time among the first boundaries to soften.
Meanwhile, almost two thirds (63%) of children said they feel more independent on holiday, with many saying travelling gives them more opportunities to try new things, make their own decisions and take on new responsibilities.
To celebrate those milestone moments, TUI has launched its My Holiday Firsts Passport, available in selected stores while stocks last, encouraging children to record every holiday first – from trying new foods and making new friends to taking on exciting new adventures.
The Childhood Independence Index: When children believe they should first experience key childhood milestones
Age in years:
- 7 Walking around a holiday resort alone
- 8 Staying at a friend’s house
- 9 Staying out later with friends
- 9 Travelling short distances alone
- 10 Walking to school alone
- 10 Going into a shop alone
- 10 Staying home alone briefly
- 10 Going shopping with friends
- 10 Spending pocket money independently
- 10 Getting a first phone
READ MORE: England fans in mass BRAWL outside Wetherspoons as pubs prepare for extended hours
