A woman has revealed how doctors allegedly “fobbed off” her concerns about extreme hair loss after giving birth as “mummy issues”.
But it was actually down to a common reason that not many women are aware of.
Rose Stokes had started to blame herself for the way she was feeling.
The 38-year-old attributed the constant waves of weakness, exhaustion and hair loss to “not being capable” of being a mum.
It quickly affected her ability to parent, made the relationship with her husband [not named for privacy reasons] harder, and ultimately dampened her own self-worth.
After multiple appointments – and lots of “back and forth gaslighting” – Rose finally had an answer; it was due to an iron deficiency.
While the issue is quite common, affecting around 8% of women in the UK according to the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence, it is often left untreated.
And can lead to serious health issues, such as being at high-risk of infections, heart problems and even organ damage.
“I think as women we often blame ourselves before we look outward,” the journalist, from Bath, told Need To Know.
“I assumed I was weak or that I wasn’t coping as well as I should have been with having two young kids.
“It’s hard even without an iron deficiency.
“Now I have been treated, I know there is a drastic difference.
“I remember wondering if I was depressed or blamed my postpartum weight gain for my sluggishness.
“Or kept thinking I was just lazy.
“It just fuelled a shame-filled spiral.
“Especially as doctors kept fobbing me off and saying: ‘Well what do you expect with two small kids?’
“I cried numerous times and was also gaslighted to believe it wasn’t as bad as it was.”
Rose hadn’t experienced any issues while pregnant – or after giving birth – with her first child [not named for privacy reasons].
While pregnant with her second, she had suffered frequent dizzy spells; though mistook this for a usual pregnancy symptom.
After giving birth in July 2024, however, her condition only worsened, with her hair falling out in clumps, as well as bouts of exhaustion never easing, even after a good night’s rest.
Other symptoms included breathlessness when walking up the stairs and a sore tongue covered with ulcers, as well as forgetfulness.
In a bid to carry on, Rose pushed herself to the hilt and ended up bed bound often due to the lack of energy.
She eventually stopped leaving the house as much and wasn’t able to spend any quality time with friends, family or her husband.
Rose said: “It affected my self-worth hugely because I thought I was failing at motherhood some days.
“My partner got used to me being dizzy, tired and anxious all the time.
“I kept routinely blocking the drains with my hair; but it was the least of my problems.
“I didn’t have it in me to care.”
In June 2025, Rose pushed doctors to find the cause and after the aforementioned treatment, got a diagnosis for being low in the protein ferritin.
It was a “validating” response and she was later placed on iron tablets.
Sadly, the side effects took a significant toll and instead, she had an iron infusion in hospital.
She hopes to share her story in a bid to raise awareness for other mums feeling a similar way to ensure they won’t be “dismissed” like she was.
Rose added: “It was subtle at first, but I feel like me again now.
“I can perform in the way I need to and I’m a much better parent to my kids, as well as a partner to my husband.
“It’s the best I’ve felt in years.
“I make a point to eat a lot of red meat and other iron-rich foods.
“If you feel like something isn’t right, keep pushing for answers.
“I’m always banging on about this and happy to help so it doesn’t get ignored.”
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